I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
