Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (207): We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math. http://tfl.nu/vxcn
  Replies (85) Good night (1599) Bad night (609)
• Favorite

  (254): View more from Texas

  You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (254): You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution" http://tfl.nu/yos3
  Replies (22) Good night (6261) Bad night (975)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (925): They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah. http://tfl.nu/e2zc
  Replies (71) Good night (994) Bad night (6940)
• Favorite

  (239): View more from Florida

  Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (239): Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot... http://tfl.nu/oqxd
  Replies (17) Good night (8397) Bad night (1468)
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (718): I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there. http://tfl.nu/dv4v
  Replies (13) Good night (4422) Bad night (1556)
• Favorite

  (662): View more from Mississippi

  It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (662): It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though http://tfl.nu/50vd
  Replies (15) Good night (4651) Bad night (1190)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (803): Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone... http://tfl.nu/bgtw
  Replies (2) Good night (1627) Bad night (736)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (608): This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me... http://tfl.nu/38uj
  Replies (10) Good night (3823) Bad night (687)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (202): He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot. http://tfl.nu/ubxb
  Replies (3) Good night (520) Bad night (1381)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (208): I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko. http://tfl.nu/cj6v
  Replies (2) Good night (600) Bad night (375)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (704): sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats http://tfl.nu/2wgg
  Replies (7) Good night (836) Bad night (1665)
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (403): His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after http://tfl.nu/sq85
  Replies (5) Good night (366) Bad night (823)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary http://tfl.nu/0652
  Replies (3) Good night (402) Bad night (957)
• Favorite

  (209): View more from California

  Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (209): Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered. http://tfl.nu/p8yt
  Replies (0) Good night (805) Bad night (335)
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (504): Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras http://tfl.nu/enu7
  Replies (3) Good night (461) Bad night (360)

Randomize