weddingsv make me drug and hornr
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
