I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
one might say we're banned from that church
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
