wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.