She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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