Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
