I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
i would punch a child for taco bell
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
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