She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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