took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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