hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
