D3 body, D1 cock
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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