Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
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