I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
Randomize