For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Randomize
