Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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