in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
There's always time for handjobs
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
