Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Randomize
