haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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