Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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