Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I'm at about main and main street
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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