She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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