is wine microwaveable?
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Randomize