Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Randomize
