no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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