I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Randomize
