My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
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