He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
Randomize