She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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