He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
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