you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
