hotel room ftw
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
