Bea Arthur died! :(
Big bird passed.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.