I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
My liver just broke up with me...
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
