Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
