that's an acceptable place to lick
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
