Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(419): View more from Ohio

His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.

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(419): His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him. http://tfl.nu/wimg

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(650): View more from California

We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign

(562): View more from California

You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo

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(650): We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign (562): You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo http://tfl.nu/9pp5

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.

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(203): Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet. http://tfl.nu/z4ao

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(971): View more from Oregon

Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.

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(971): Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them. http://tfl.nu/y8vc

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(732): View more from New Jersey

He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.

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(732): He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs. http://tfl.nu/h7d3

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(360): View more from Washington

i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.

(1-360): View more from Washington

oh. my. god. yes.

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(360): i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life. (1-360): oh. my. god. yes. http://tfl.nu/jrnd

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(530): View more from California

You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.

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(530): You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her. http://tfl.nu/7jba

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(708): View more from Illinois

what are we doing this weekend?

(1-708): View more from Illinois

I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.

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(708): what are we doing this weekend? (1-708): I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store. http://tfl.nu/uvwp

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song

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(+44): He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song http://tfl.nu/ouwi

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(480): View more from Arizona

got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University

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(480): got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University http://tfl.nu/6mss

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(479): View more from Arkansas

That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!

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(479): That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?! http://tfl.nu/832w

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(208): View more from Idaho

Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver

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(208): Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver http://tfl.nu/xi4h

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.

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(401): also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part. http://tfl.nu/nmg6

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(518): View more from New York

That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz

(978): View more from Massachusetts

Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing

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(518): That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz (978): Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing http://tfl.nu/v9yz

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.

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(+44): I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten. http://tfl.nu/hxkk

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