Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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