I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
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