Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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