he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Randomize
