That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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