i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
