Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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