Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
