i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize