White coat. Heels.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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