look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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