Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
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