this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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