and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
