eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
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