Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
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